25 signs that you’re no longer hip…

1. You use the word hip

2. They play your prom song on the oldies station

3. The baseball stadium you went to as a child no longer exists

4. Forget about the cops looking young, the chief of police looks as young as your paperboy

5. You know what a paperboy is

6. You like classic rap better

7. You think Frank Lautenberg and Arlen Specter have a few good terms left in them

8. They try to find a place without too many stairs for your high school reunion

9. In your day, TV was free and long distance phone calls were expensive

10. You remember when cars made in Japan were lower quality than ones built in America

11. You still refer to George Steinbrenner as the new owner of the Yankees

12. You used to let your fingers do the walking

13. You bought into Phase I of Boca Del Vista

14. You had to hide under your desk during Cold War air raid drills

15. Chuck Taylors were cheap sneakers, not a fashion statement

16. You assume the word “hip” is always followed by “replacement”

17. Your teachers told you that the United States would be on the metric system by 1980 (that must have been another unfunded government mandate).

18. Americans didn’t care about the World Cup (oh wait, that hasn’t changed)

19. You know what WYSIWYG means

20. And along those lines, you remember typing after a C prompt

21. You are tempted to finally open the AARP membership junk mail instead of immediately tossing it

22. The President of the United States is younger than you

23. Being invited to a tea party event meant an afternoon of old ladies and bite-sized sandwiches

24. You start to forget things

25. I can’t remember the last one

Am I missing anything?